Friday, August 10, 2007

Funny How That Works...

Grief that is. You're going along okay, planning vacations, reconnecting with old friends, starting to live life as a single person instead of a twosome... and then out of nowhere, it hits you. Like a blow to the stomach... a blow that has taken your best friend away. Then you go over all the reasons, legitimate reasons, for now being without that best friend. But it doesn't help... because those reasons won't make you laugh at the grocery store, support you in everything you do or bring you gingerale when you are sick. The hardest part is that you have willingly inflicted this grief upon yourself... because for whatever reason you weren't as happy as you thought you could be, or should be. You were angry alot and thought that is no way to start a life with someone else. So you make a tough decision and say good bye to a really great guy and your best friend. And you hope it's not you and that someday you'll find another best friend and this time you won't be angry or worried or resentful. And you hope that you learned from this and that this grief is for a reason and is making you a stronger person.

6 comments:

Allison said...

I hear ya sistah...hopefully, esp. in the wee hours of the night, you can stay strong and do what's best for you! Good luck!

Shannan said...

It stinks how stuff just sneaks up on you like that. (((HUGS)))

Pattyjo said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.
My oldest son died (10 yrs now) when he was 27 in an accident. You described just the way I was feeling through this time. Its hard to understand why people continue to go shopping, laughing, traveling...Don't they know of the tragedy that has taken place?! How could they smile and just go on as normal? Time helps, you never are the same again, but time helps.

Heidi Ellis said...

You will definitely find the point of this down the road, Laura. I always find the tough things in life have brought me to where I am today. And right now that's a really great place. You'll find someone again, and that person will make you truly happy.

Jen Vogelsong said...

Oh, how well do I know this...
The good thing is those moments don't last forever and they become less frequent. You're getting stronger (although that's probably the last thing you want right now!)
Love ya

Kelly Albright (aka BrightIdeas) said...

Hey, just wanted to send you ((((hugs)))). I know it's hard to let go of someone you have invested so much time into. But you WILL meet someone who doesn't bring you down. Stay encouraged!